Pretense
by shabam
Summary: Subtle? Sirius thinks. He glances over at Remus and sees the same kind of bewilderment. We're not subtle? I thought we put on a good pretense.' A series of drabbles on the discovery of Remus' and Sirius' relationship. Oneshot.


  
**Title: **Pretense  
**Author: **Lady Wildcat on FFN/tehangst on Livejournal.  
**Pairing(s): **Remus/Sirius  
**Rating: **PG for snoggage.  
**Summary:** A series of drabbles on the discovery of Remus' and Sirius' relationship.  
**Author's Note: **First slash fic on FFN! Not to mention the first fic in a while. Anyhow, this is a one-shot. I quite like it, hope you will too. Reviews and constructive crit always appreciated.

**I.**

Remus likes kissing Sirius. He likes the lazy way the other boy tangles his fingers in his hair right before gently pulling on his lower lip. He likes the way Sirius runs his fingers lightly over his ribs. He likes how he can feel Sirius smiling as he kisses him.

He especially likes that they are alone, completely and finally alone, in Sirius's room in the Potter's house. It is quite useful that James's grandmother is ornery, and only wants the family to see her when she is sick, and wants the Potters to leave their houseguests. At home. Alone.

Remus smiles and traces patterns on Sirius's neck, feeling the other boy moan into him. The afternoon sunlight is filtering lazily through the window, and Remus feels quite content and warm and happ--

Creak at the doorway. "Oi, we're back, Grans is--AAUGH!"

Sirius makes a noise that sounds like "moof", gives a startled jerk, and promptly sends he and Remus rolling over the side of the bed and crashing to the floor. After a brief struggle, Remus manages to disentangle himself from Sirius' legs--which, strangely, have become wrapped in pretzel-like formation around his head--and peek over the top of the bed.

"WHAT THE BLOODY FUCK," James says, "IS THIS?"

Remus racks his brain for explanations and, finding none, begins to plan his relocation to Barbados.

"Hullo, James," Sirius says weakly.

**II.**

"Katie Windsor." Sirius takes a drag off of his cigarette. "She's got a nice chest, hasn't she?"

"Too tall." James mentally scratches her name off the list. "Pete'd look like a house-elf next to her."

"I don't mind," Peter says dejectedly. "I just need a date, is all."

"Saundra Quinlan might do," Remus says quietly, not looking up from his History of Magic essay (he was the only one actually bothering to do it). "She's a very nice girl."

"With a face like a horse." Sirius winces.

"Well, Yule Ball's in two weeks, he can't exactly pick and choose at this point," James cautions. He attempts to keep a flush of pride at actually having a date--at actually taking Lily Evans to the ball--out of his tone of voice, but to no avail.

Sirius notices. "James won't notice who Pete shows up with," he crows, "he'll be too busy trying to get Evans up in the Astronomy tower."

James turns beet-red, but Peter cuts in. "Why did you suggest Katie, Sirius, I thought you wanted to take her?"

"He isn't taking anyone," James retorts automatically, "or Remus won't give him sex for a month."

It's the way they've always operated--insult met with insult, topped off with a scuffle or a hex and then a truce--but James can see from the way Sirius' mouth falls open that he's gone too far.

Remus' quill abruptly stops scratching. Peter's eyes widen to the size of saucepans. James can't move from the awful weight of what he's just said and the accusation in Sirius' glance gluing him to the armchair.

"What was that?" Peter asks squeakily.

"Nothing!" Sirius regains his composure--or an adrenaline-filled version of it--and exhales smoke with a shaky, loud laugh. "Absolutely nothing, Pete, old sport, James is such a joker, isn't he? Ha ha ha ha?"

Unfortunately, Peter chooses this moment to be perceptive. He looks from Sirius twitching nervously in his chair, to Remus staring at his essay as if to bore holes into it, then finally to James.

"Is there something," he asks, "I am missing?"

**III.**

There are too many third-years for Minerva McGonagall's liking. They are her least favorite year. They squabble amongst themselves far too much and write sloppy essays and somehow always manage to turn their pincushions not into hedgehogs, but into either great thorny briar bushes that eat her textbooks or very ugly puppies. The puppies are harder to get rid of than the bushes, and will often snarl and chew on her robes when she attempts to turn them back into pincushions. Ghastly year, the third-years are.

She supposes that's why she always, without fail, forgets the stack of their essays in her classroom. She should be eating lunch, but she's forgotten to grade their essays for the fifth week in a row and has just remembered in the middle of a bite of apple pie.

Minerva loves apple pie. Blasted third-years and their blasted essays. She is in a foul mood.

The way her day is going, she thinks, she wouldn't be surprised if a troll has managed to sneak into her classroom and she has to deal with it. Blasted trolls. She subconciously readies herself for some sort of monster as she opens the door.

But nothing can prepare her for the sight of Sirius Black and Remus Lupin snogging against a desk in the front row.

Minerva yelps. Both boys fly apart as if they've been stung by something.

The first thing she thinks is _grab the essays and go _and then _why is it always _my _classroom _and then _sweet Merlin, Black is kissing a boy _and then _I need some Firewhiskey._

"Well...I...well... _you two _?" she stutters. For once, she is at a loss for words.

The boys notice this and guiltily straighten their clothing as she regains her composure.

"Well," she says again, drawing herself up to her full height and trying to hide her utter and complete bewilderment at the situation at hand. Black and _Lupin? _"This is...an interesting situation...certainly, yes," she says, attempting to retain her authoritarian tone. "I wouldn't have thought...Mr. Black...or especially you, Mr. Lupin, to..." She stops, confused, not exactly sure how to handle this, then promptly falls on the reliable solution. "Detention, both of you," she says firmly. "Private... _interactions _, in _my _classroom--"

"Oh, professor, don't." Black steps forward. "Remus didn't have anything to do with it, it was all me, really, he wanted to keep it in the dorms because he knew you wouldn't like it if we snogged in your classroom--"

"_Sirius _," Lupin growls. "Shut up."

Minerva doesn't believe Black for a minute, and is about to tell him so. But there's something in his eyes as he defends Lupin, and a little bit of it is reflected in Lupin's tone toward Black. For some reason--or it could just be the pie calling from the Great Hall--it softens her resolve.

Really, does she want to handle giving them detention?

She sighs. She isn't up to it today. Knowing Black, he'll probably get detention by the end of the day anyway.

"It's good for you," she mutters, "that I am feeling generous." The boys relax visibly. "I don't want to see this again. Next time I catch you at it, you'll be forced to...do something _really _unpleasant in detention," she finishes lamely.

They sprint off before she can change her mind. Minerva grabs the essays off of her desk and exits the classroom, wondering if Albus will give her some of his homemade Firewhiskey. It's days like these when she knows why he needs it.

**IV.**

Boyfriend?

Sirius mulls over the word in his head, trying it on. Boyfriend, boyfriend.

It's strange to him. Sirius has never thought of Remus as his boyfriend.

_Don't want to be a complete poof, do we? _a voice in his head jeers. Sirius pushes it aside at first, but then considers it. He does like Remus, and he likes being with Remus more than he likes being with a lot of girls, and he likes the things Remus does to him, certainly. Sometimes, Remus will laugh, or look at Sirius in that way he has, and Sirius will think that maybe--just maybe--he cares more about Remus than he has ever cared about anyone, ever. But Sirius is not sentimental, and he forgets as quickly about those incidents as they come, because he and Remus were just supposed to be an experiment when they started.

Perhaps he is a poof. The thought which has plagued him in the past now seems strangely fitting. Well. If being a poof means wanting to be with Remus, he supposes he is one.

Boyfriend. He looks over at Remus, finishing his Potions homework in the empty common room. Yes, that would be the word.

Filled with sudden resolve, Sirius leans over to Remus. "Remuuusss..." he whispers in his ear.

"You should be doing your homework," the other boy responds automatically.

Sirius plants his lips along Remus' hairline, where he knows he likes it. "I was thinking," he says between kisses.

"Ungh." Remus squirms. "Don't really have time for sex now, Sirius, thanks."

"Silly arse." Sirius moves his lips along Remus' jawline. "No, I mean...what if we go to Hogsmeade this weekend? Just you and me."

Remus pauses. "Alone?"

"Yes." Sirius stops and looks at him, trying to convey that he really means it. "You know...a real date."

Remus just looks at him. This is not what they had planned or talked about. This goes beyond snogging...or meaningless sex...although that seems silly, doesn't it, Sirius thinks wildly as Remus still doesn't reply--sex before a date. It was just curiosity that brought them together, really, no deep feelings. Is it right, to want to go beyond the physical?

Sirius thinks, for a fleeting moment, he'll say no. But Remus leans over and kisses him and Sirius can taste his acceptance and something else that is frightening and warm at the same time, and he decides that yes, this is right.

"Oh good, you _are _here."

They break apart quickly and awkwardly ( _NEED an alert charm _Sirius thinks for the thousandth time) to see Lily Evans standing in front of them, hands on hips.

"Lily," Remus says dazedly, removing his hand jerkily from Sirius' neck.

She doesn't seem surprised at the scene. "James wants you down in the Hall. Says he's got a new charm to show you." She rolls her eyes. "If it's for a prank, spare me the details. He says to hurry."

They can't do anything but blink up at her. "How--you--did James tell you?" Sirius manages to spit out.

"About you two? No, he wouldn't."

"Then how--" Sirius is lost. No one is supposed to know--but now James, Peter, McGonagall ( _oh God _)--

Lily laughs, leaving Sirius still confused. "You're not exactly subtle, are you, now? I'd like to get back to my dinner, if you will."

_Subtle? _Sirius thinks. He glances over at Remus and sees the same kind of bewilderment. _We're not subtle? I thought we put on a good pretense._

Then Sirius knows that the pretense was a pretense in itself all along. He looks at Remus, takes his hand, and follows Lily.


End file.
